Naso Rosso (Laurello Vineyards) - red wine

If you have read any of the other wine reviews in this Trader Joe’s blog, you KNOW I am not a wine snob.  Heck, I am a cheap date as far as wine is concerned!!!  I have given a 4.25 star review to a CHARLES SHAW Sauvignon Blanc that costs $3.29, folks (see that review here:  C.S. Sauvignon Blanc .  I don’t think anyone could call me elitist in the wine department…

And I am a big fan of CLOWNS.  A clown is featured on this wine label, which was the major selling point for me.  In fact, when it all boils down to it, I am MARRIED to a clown.  David is also known as Dr. Beano in the Big Apple Circus Clown Care Unit and performs in Children's National Medical Center in DC.  We also go to loads of circuses, like, way more circuses than the average person attends…  We were at one just last week (Barnum and Bailey), and one of my most memorable birthdays was when I was treated to not ONE but TWO circuses on the same day!!

Dr. Beano waiting for kids to arrive for the Big Apple Circus of the Senses 

Dr. Beano juggling

And yet...  And yet, as you will soon see, I cannot in good faith give this wine a good review.  Hell, I cannot even give it a mediocre review.  Because as much as I love to support the “little guy”, as much as I root for the “underdog”, and as much as I like to “buy local”, I feel the need to warn anyone who might happen on this bottle of crap in an Ohio Trader Joe’s…  My love of circus clowns and my desire to drink cheap wine cannot save this dreck.

When we go to a new town I always check to see if they have a Trader Joe’s.  And when we go to a new TJ’s, I always hunt for something unique to that state/city/store.  Almost every item in TJ’s stores is uniform – if you find it in California you will find it in Florida.  But they usually have something unique, one or two LOCAL items.  And that is what I hunt for and buy!  Sometimes it is a HONEY (like Mike’s Hot Honey, see review here: Mike's Hot Honey ).  Often it is a BEER (like Rail Splitter IPA, see review here:  Rail Splitter IPA ).  And sometimes it is a bottle of local wine, like this crappy bottle of Laurello Vineyards Naso Rosso from Geneva, Ohio… 

I was lured in by the artwork on the label.  As PT Barnum said, "There's a sucker born every minute".

The store employee in Ohio actually subtly warned me that this was not a great wine…  In fact, if I remember right, he quietly told me this was a BAD WINE…  We bought this bottle last fall and kept it in our wine rack.  I referred to it as THE SCARY CLOWN WINE because seriously, this is one scary ass clown on the label!!  (And no, I do not have coulrophobia, fear of clowns.  But if YOU ran into this clown in a dark alley you would do well to be frightened!!)  I was so distracted by the scary clown drawing that I never even NOTICED the name of the wine is “Naso Rosso” – or RED NOSE.  David just pointed out to me now that the name “Red Nose” also references a drunk’s perpetually red nose.  Clever, Laurello Vineyards, clever!  (If only you put as much work into the making of a tasty wine as you did into naming it…) 

We recently traveled across country to California and it took us 17 hours to get home to DC.  So as a treat when we got back, I opened the SCARY CLOWN WINE!  Just OPENING it, before I had even poured or tasted it, I got a whiff of “not good”.  It smelled like a super strong GRAPE KOOL-AID.  It was, how shall I say, ODD…

Then I tasted it, and it tasted like C-R-A-P.  It tastes like a mixture of grape Kool-Aid, sugar, and cough syrup.  Those tastes are NOT really what I am looking for in a bottle of wine…  The label says, “Wine should be as spontaneous as a circus clown, and as appreciated as a piece of fine art.  Nasso Roso is a fun, fruity red wine perfect for any occasion.  The clown “Tete de Clown” is a famous piece from French artist Bernard Buffet.  To enjoy all of Bernard’s work visit his website http://bernardbuffet.com/  .” 

Promo image from "A Little Business at the Big Top" - David's circus show.  We will be on the road with it this summer!

David is a clown.  David studied clown in France.  David has an original one man show that is a circus piece, and we have hunted for wine with circus labels to give to technicians as thank you gifts.  Lord, I am glad that we did not give this crappy bottle of wine to a technician!!  I would be mortified now that I know what it tastes like if we had given it as a gift.

Here is what David thought of Scary Clown Wine (aka Naso Rosso): “You are right.  This is a terrible bottle of wine.  You nailed the essential problem areas; cough syrup, sugar, and grape Kool-Aid/grape juice elements. This is a wine that exists in the spectrum of the Jewish religious table wines – the Manishewitz that I tasted in my youth comes to mind.  But this is probably even worse than that.  This is definitely BAD.  I am sure someone out there will enjoy it…  But it is not us.  It would probably get you drunk if it is a cold night and you are on the streets”.

But then we considered all of the other places (other than on the streets) you could be where you might be wanting a bottle of wine – in a house, an apartment, a hotel room, a teepee, a tiny house, a balcony, a TENT…  If you are in any of those places, do not get this wine.  Trust us.

It is rare that we even think of dumping out a bottle of wine.  We drank about four drinks of Scary Clown and then agreed that we had to do something we had never done before – THROW OUT A JUST OPENED BOTTLE OF WINE.  Yes, it was that crappy.

Yes, it was THAT BAD.

If you live in Ohio and you go to Trader Joe’s buy ANY OTHER WINE instead of this.  And if you live in a state other than TJ’s and cannot find this wine in your store, you can thank your lucky stars.

David and I agreed that this wine deserves .25 stars.  And trust me, the stars are not for the actual WINE.  They are for the scary clown artwork. 

Rating - .25

Price – $9.99

(Shopper alert:  GET EMMA PEARL WINE instead!  It is only $3.99 and got a 5 star review here:  Emma Pearl

Bonus photo!  Us at the circus, Dulles, VA

Note:  Laurello Vineyards, I am sorry to diss your wine so badly.  I wanted to like it, honestly I did!!  I looked at your website (Laurello Vineyards ) and you look like a lovely vineyard!!  I imagine that the other wines you produce taste much better than Scary Clown.  (It DOES worry me a bit, though, that you classify Naso Rosso as “semi sweet”…  I told David that and he said, “God help us when they get to the sweet ones if that is semi sweet!”.)  Anyway, I am willing to let bygones be bygones.  If we ever end up in your neck of the woods, I will pop in for a tasting.  Let’s be clear, NOT a tasting of Scary Clown, but of your other wines!  J )

2nd bonus photo - us at Circus Vargas in San Diego, CA.  See - I TOLD you we go to lots of circuses!

Incorrect Labeling...

There are 2 Trader Joe's products that have the nutritional labeling ALL WRONG.  Well, in our opinion anyway...  Normally TJ's hits the nail pretty much on the head with their "serving size" recommendation, but on 2 of their products they are waaaaaay off...  They are:

Caramel and Cheddar Popcorn Mix (formerly known as Chicago Style Popcorn)
Caramel and Cheddar Popcorn mix review here

and

Pico de Gallo Salsa
Hot Pico de Gallo Salsa review here
The portion sizes listed on the labels are LAUGH OUT LOUDable!

I could eat this everyday.  

David with one of his favorite snacks (before TJ's changed the name of this product)

First off, the popcorn.  "About 6 servings".  SIX SERVINGS???  Are you KIDDING me Trader Joe's??  Anyone who has the self control to split this bag into 6 servings should be knighted or given sainthood.  This bag is 2.5 servings.  :)

And the SALSA, I said it before and I will say it again, the idea of this salsa container holding 10 servings is INSANE.  10 servings for 10 Barbie dolls PERHAPS, but 10 servings for any humans with TJ's blue chips to dip in them???  AIN'T NO WAY.  This tub holds exactly TWO servings of salsa for this human.

Are there are TJ's products that you buy that seem "off" on the serving size listed??  These are the two that get me every time.

And now that I have finished the popcorn and the salsa, I need to make another run to Trader Joe's!!

Popcorn in a Pickle - IT'S BAAAACK!

Summer must be coming, because POPCORN IN A PICKLE is back on the shelves at Trader Joe's!  Yes siree, the snack that sounds disgusting but is actually very tasty is BACK!  Same weird taste, same price ($1.99).  Check out what we thought of it when we got it last year:

original review here

I saw it on the shelves recently in California, but didn't want to announce it in public here until I checked to see if it was "only a California thing" or if the rest of us were also lucky enough to snag some.  Turns out it is here in Virginia, too, so I am going to declare it POPCORN IN A  PICKLE SEASON!

Here is David last year, he was nervous about this snack...  But after we tried it, turns out, WE LIKE IT!!

If you tried it before, you know the first bite is odd but it gets yummy after that.  If you haven't tried it, go for it.  It is a strange taste sensation and fun to eat!

But get it soon.  Cuz you don't want to be like our friend Tony, and go to get a bag only to find it is G-O-N-E and won't come back for another year...

Sad Tony, no Popcorn in a Pickle to be found...

New Zealand Sweet Apple Rings

I bought this bag of dried apples at the Omaha, Nebraska Trader Joe’s but ended up bringing with us on a long flight to Los Angeles.  I thought, “Dried fruit will be great to munch on while on the flight or while driving from LA to Palm Springs!”.  It turns out, in David’s mind at least, I was oh so wrong…

From New Zealand - they must be exotic and delicious, right????

I have to confess that the MARKETING message swayed my purchase.  I am embarrassed to admit it, but the fact that these were not just “apple rings” but NEW ZEALAND Sweet Apple Rings did make me think they might taste exotic, fancy, New Zealand-y.  The front of the package says they are Braeburn, Royal Gala, and “Seasonal Varieties” of apples, but if you read the fine print on the back you see that “seasonal varieties” must mean Fuji and Pink Lady apples.  I guess TJ’s thinks “seasonal varieties” sounds sexier than listing them all out, and that must’ve worked on me, cuz I bought ‘em.

And David was not a fan.  Here is what he said, “No likey.  It’s not pungent.  It’s dry.  Leathery.  A little big cardboard-y.  It has none of the juiciness, none of the tartness, none of the FLAVOR that makes an apple worth chewing.  Umm…  It has a lot of PULPINESS (said with a disgusted look on face…) if you like that sort of thing…  I do not like these.  They taste a little bit of some desiccating agent that maybe they sprinkled on it…  I don’t know what that would be.  Maybe some sugar, salty, some sort of FLAVORING??  (When I explained they are unsulfured and unsweetened, he retorted “Well then I guess they are just naturally UNTASTY!”).  They have all the flavor of a Red Delicious apple (which David dislikes…).  I give them a 1.”

Us at the wedding in Palm Springs, CA.  We disagreed on the dried apples, but agreed that the wedding was lovely.

I did not think they were as horrible as David did.  We do not normally buy dried apples.  I think I have only had them before as little squares in dried fruit mixes (not from TJ’s).  And those little apple square bits were always my favorites in the mix!  I would pick them out of the bag and eat them first. They were always tasty and somehow JUICY, even though they were DRIED, and had a good texture.  So when I saw this bag at TJ’s that was JUST THE APPLES, I thought BINGO, a whole bag of the best part of dried fruit mixes!!   Sadly, these are not as good as the little squares I remember from my youth.

Omaha TJ's signage.  I think David would disagree with the "sweet and lovely" part.
And, umm, why is there a squirrel playing a banjo on the sign?

I disagree with David’s “cardboard-y” assessment.  I think they do have moisture in them, but they do not have a lot of taste.  They are a little boring and bland.  You would NOT want to eat the whole big ass 8 oz bag in one sitting.  David ate ONE apple ring on the airplane and I had to force feed him one more on the car ride just to get his review.  The package says the serving size is ten rings, but David theory is that if you ate ten of them you would throw up.  J  (He exaggerates if you ask me, they are not that bad.) 

David was the officiant of the wedding.  Check out how well he tied his bow tie!!

I think if you have kids and you pack a lunch for them, you could put 4 or 5 of these apple rings into a Tupperware container or baggy for a healthy dessert or snack.  (David says if you pack these in a kid’s lunch it is child abuse…)   Or if you work at a desk I can see eating 4 or 5 of these in the afternoon with a cup of tea.  You might be able to bake with them, but I haven’t tried that.  I think I will sneak some of these in David’s lunchbox when he is not looking.  I suspect they will still be in there when he gets home, unless he cons an unsuspecting coworker into eating them. 

I give these a 2.75.

Since David was so down on these things, I thought it would be good to get a 3^rd opinion, so I chose Adelaide.  She just turned 2 and was attending the same wedding in Palm Springs that we went to.  Being only 2 years old, she doesn’t really TALK all that much…  But I gave her some apple rings and she really liked ‘em!!!  She two fisted it for a while – apple ring in each hand.  And she was happy to put a few apple rings in her dad’s pocket so she could eat more later (her shorts had fake pockets (fockets) so she couldn’t tote the rings around herself).  Anyway, Adelaide thought they were really yummy.  If she could talk and knew her numbers, I think she would give them a 4. 

Adelaide helped me with a bit of artwork

Would I buy them again for US?  No.  Would I buy them again if Adelaide and her brother and sister came to visit?  Sure enough.

Adelaide taking a quick dip in the pool with her dad

Price – $3.49

Rating (average of 3 raters, one of which was too little to give her own score so I had to surmise it…) – 2.5

TJ's Neighbor Share Program - It's AMAZING!

Once again, my world's of KINDNESS and TRADER JOE'S collide midstream!!

Have you ever noticed a store hanging at your local Trader Joe's that talks about DONATIONS?  I saw them as we traveled around and popped into Trader Joe's all over the country last year.  I SAW the signs, but I didn't really PAY ATTENTION to them...

Most stores have these signs, but I never paid attention to them.  Until now!

So recently I decided to ask some questions and figure out what in the world TJ's donates.  I was very happy I asked, because it turns out they not only have cool employees, great food at good prices, and awesome wine - they also are SUPER KIND TO THEIR COMMUNITIES!!

Seriously, next time you shop at TJ's just take a second to thank them.  Not all stores bother to give back to the neighbors, but TJ's sure does.

Read about their Neighbor Share program at the link below and be inspired!

Donating Kindness

Thank You note hanging in the Clarendon store from a thankful artist.  :)

Extraordinary Eggs Marbled Chocolates

It is a new season, spring, and you know what that means:  SEASONAL PRODUCTS AT TRADER JOE’S!  Granted, springtime does not bring with it the plethora of products that autumn does (can you say PUMPKIN anyone??), but none-the-less, it is exciting to see different, limited time offerings on the shelves.

oops - a bit blurry - sorry.

And of course I need to try and review at least one seasonal product!  Which is why I invested in these Extraordinary Eggs Marbled Chocolates!  I say “invested” because at $4.99, these are more expensive than your average Easter candy J (think hollow waxy chocolate bunny or hard as a rock jelly beans…).

They are EXTRAORDINARY - it says so right in the product name!

I had seen these at our local Northern Virginia Trader Joe’s, so when I was perusing the shelves this week at the Omaha, Nebraska TJ’s I had them on my (mental) grocery  list.  Oddly though, I couldn’t find them.  They weren’t on the “new products” end cap, nor were they in the fancy ass chocolate section.  So I asked and was led to them – hidden in an unfortunate area by the cookies over the frozen foods.  I would say put those suckers out where people can see them and get excited about them, but maybe the Omaha store was trying to do the whole “hide the Easter egg” thing…

Anyway, I was in charge of making a nice dinner for some of my family members and a friend, so these fancy eggs were part of that event.  I gave every person one beautiful chocolate egg in a dainty little bright colored bowl at their place setting.  They were lovely!  In fact, they were SO LOVELY that at least two people at the dinner thought they were WOODEN EASTER DECORATIONS!!  J  No lie!

A small photo of a small egg in a small bowl

Here is how these pretty little eggs went down:

Me:  First off, they are gorgeous.  The “painting” on the outside coating is like artwork.  I like that they were SHINY, too.  The green ones looked BLUE to me - like robin eggs with little spots.  There are 16 eggs in a package, and the packaging itself is also very pretty – it almost looks like the treats are riding in a delicate little gold egg carton.  There are 4 different flavors of eggs – almond praline, caramel, raspberry, and crispy cookies.  By the time I finished dinner (which was all Trader Joe’s food, of course…) I really was not hungry for dessert, but the eggs are tiny and so I could “squeeze one in”.  It was quite yummy!  I thought they were rich and delicious.  They are from France and really taste like quality chocolate (not, as mentioned above, like the crappy Easter candy of my youth).  (Note:  not that my youth was bad!!  But these eggs are to the jelly beans of my youth as a 1972 Ford Pinto is to a 2016 Prius J ).  The package says a serving size is 3 eggs, which seems like tooooo many to me.  One was plenty, and I can see someone eating two.  But three would be overkill.  I think these would make a wonderful gift.   I would give these a 4.75, the high score representing their beauty as much as the taste.

These are real robin eggs in a nest at my house, but don't they look like the Extraordinary Eggs at Trader Joe's?

Jordan (my nephew): “ I enjoyed the fact that these Easter eggs looked like REAL EGGS, not candy.  I tried hard to separate mine into 4 bites so I could show everyone what was inside. When I bit it, it did not crumble apart.  These are very well made.  I savored each bite.  I don’t think that I could eat more than one, it was so rich, but delicious.  I would give these a 4.”

Jordan, carefully biting his egg into pieces to show us the inside of it

Sherry (my sister):  “These are very good.  They are PRETTY.  They are not your typical Easter candy looking egg.  I would give them a 4.5.”

Sherry, enjoying her Extraordinary Egg

Zach (Jordan’s partner):  “I thought the eggs were very good.  They were very rich and chocolately.  I like the way they look, too, they are very pretty.  I would give these a solid 3.”

Abhishek (new friend from India):  “I found these were DECEIVING!  I thought it was a showpiece, but it turned out to be CHOCOLATE!!!  I would give them a 3.25.”

Jim:  “I thought the same thing Abhishek did!  I thought they were wooden and I was pleasantly surprised that they didn’t taste like WOOD!  I would give them a 4.”

Sherry and Jim:  "These are muuuuch better than a Cadbury egg.  And much better than a Brach’s egg!"

Everyone at the dinner party:  THESE ARE MUCH BETTER THAN A WOODEN EGG!

This is a classic photo of my sisters and I one Easter.  Sherry is rocking a hat. Annette is standing in a fashion model pose. And me?  Well, I look like I must have had to pee.

I am pleased to say that I have a few of these eggs to bring home to David when I return!  He will be very happy with them I am sure.  I recommend you buy a package before TJ's runs out of them.  They are a sweet way to celebrate the arrival of springtime. 

Price: $4.99 (which is more than a hollow chocolate Easter bunny from the drug store, but when you do the math each little beautiful egg is only .31 cents!)
Rating (average of 6 raters): 4

Note:  Trader Joe’s has similar looking chocolates in the shape of marbles.  I suspect they are the same, but have not tried those.  But if you buy these egg shaped ones and get addicted, I think you can get your fill with the marble shaped ones when the eggs are out of season J . 

Life is Short - Buy the Tulips

Life is short.
Buy the damn tulips.
(Or fancy seasonal lotion or oranges that are only out for 2 weeks a year...)

You get what I'm saying.  Sometimes life is worth a little SPLURGE. A couple of weeks ago I bought the tulips at Trader Joe's even though I feared they were a bit more than I should be spending at the moment.

And look what happened.

GORGEOUS

THEY BLOOMED.  And they brought smiles, joy, and beauty to our home.

Who knows, it might be too late for this particular purchase.  But the next time you are at TJ's and you see a seasonal item that you are not sure if you should go for, just do it.  Buy the tulips, man.

P.S.- here is the original review of this product:  tulips bulbs in glass vase

Two Worlds Colliding

Have you ever had the experience of two of your “worlds” colliding?  You know, like you meet someone that you only know from WORK while you are at the MALL…  Or you think no one knows you are into dressing up like Harry Potter, then you run into your neighbor at a Harry Potter convention and you are both in full Harry attire…  (Note:  that was a totally MADE UP example, I do not dress up like Harry Potter, I have not seen the Harry Potter movies, nor have I read the books.  I was just trying to get my point across about two worlds colliding J .)

Anyway, two of my worlds collided recently when a friend sent me a link to the story of a Trader Joe’s cashier in California who was super kind to a family checking out in her line.  My TRADER JOE’S world and my KINDNESS world collided smack dab in the middle!  It was fabulous!

Kindness in the check-out line

I read the article, then set about doing a bit of research.  I got to message with the mom involved in the story and talk on the phone to the cashier!  It was super.  I have named ELISE, the TJ’s cashier, a Kindness Activist.  I hope she is wearing her button at work even as I type.  J

You can read about it all here:  Cashier Kindness

And if you live in the Antioch/Brentwood, California area and happen to go thru Elise’s line at Trader Joe’s, give her a big smile and a “thanks”.  She rocks.

P.S. Now that I wrote this, I keep hearing this song in my head:  Never Tear Us Apart

100,000 HITS!!!

Guys, it is a huge day!! Today, February 24, 2016, at exactly 5:43 PM EST this Trader Joe's 365 blog reached 100,000 hits!!  

To celebrate, I tried to make a fun video that was little clips of me being happy (and goofy) all glued together. But I didn't know how to use the only equipment I had to film it, and I accidentally made it UPSIDE DOWN.   When I uploaded it, I was amused (and perplexed) by the upside down-edness of it all. But guess what? When I plugged it in HERE on the blog, it automatically righted itself! Hey! So here is me celebrating!

And hey, here is a photo of me in a hallway jumping for joy at the big accomplishment!! 100,000 hits on my blog - wheeeee!!!

Can you sense my excitement???

So yeah, it is a big day. Maybe 100,000 doesn't seem like a lot to you in this day of "viral videos", but to me, that many views of my crazy project makes me very happy (and grateful).

THANKS FOR READING EVERYONE!!!!!

Love,

Susan

Tulip Bulbs in Glass Vase

IT IS SPRING!!!

Of course, this is easy to declare on a day like today:  I have the day off work, the sun is shining, and it is a glorious day.

Ask me again in a couple of days when it is cold and rainy and I might not have such a positive outlook.

In any event, for now anyway, IT IS SPRING.  And Spring means BLOOMS – trees, tulips, crocus…  Spring is LOVELY!!! 

LOOK - flowers are starting to pop up in our yard!!

The other night we were in line at TJ’s and a lady in the line next to us had 2 glass vases that I had never seen at the store before.  I asked her about them and she was happy to explain – they were glass vases with tulip bulbs in them!!!  You keep water in the bottom of the vase, leave it in the sun, and before you know it VOILA – YOU HAVE TULIPS!!!   She said she gives them to her grandmothers every year.  Can we get a collective “Awwwwww” for that??  I mean, is that not a PERFECT grandma gift??  She said her grandmothers are thrifty, too, and they always use the glass vases for something else when the tulips are done.  I have to think that the grandmas also take the bulbs and plant them outside somewhere, too.

Tulip Bulbs in a glass vase

So I sort of wanted to grab one that night, but we were already in line.  And they were $8.99, which seems sort of expensive…  Plus, my grocery store date didn’t say, “Susan, you NEED that!  Let me go grab one for you!!”.  So, I didn’t get one.

But I kept thinking about it.  So today when we went back to TJ’s I grabbed one!!  I went for PINK.  I think I would have preferred the PURPLE actually, but the pink ones were less developed, meaning I will get to watch them bloom more!  I can’t wait to see the flowers pop out.

Look - I got one!!!

So yes, $8.99 does seem a wee bit pricy for 4 tulip bulbs in a glass vase.  But they are imported from HOLLAND, so they must be fancy.  :)  And do you know what?  I am worth it – and so are YOU!  And we make like grandmas and use the glass vases for something else after the tulips die, right? 

Looky looky - 2 pink tulips are already starting to make their appearance...   

I recommend you go to Trader Joe’s stat and pick one up.  I am most certain they will not have these Spring time beauties for very long.  Splurge a bit on yourself.  And while you are there, get one for your mom.  And your grandma.  They aren’t going to be around forever, you know, and if you are lucky enough to still have them in your life, SPOIL ‘EM. 

Here are a couple of other signs of SPRING at the Big Yellow House! 

Peachy - the peach tree - is getting buds!

Mr. and Mrs. Dove are hanging out in the dogwood tree almost
all the time now!  Can eggs be far behind??

And the dogwood will be in bloom soon, too!!

Price - $8.99

Rating – 4.75

Cara Cara Navel Oranges: The Sequel

Guys, I hate to do this.  I really don’t want to, but I feel I must.

I am DOWNGRADING the rating of Cara Cara Navel Oranges originally posted almost a year ago.

We LOVED Cara Cara oranges last year.  They were tasty.  They were sweet.  They were juicy.  They were the bomb.  Here is the original review from Day 66 of 365:

Cara Cara review

So this year when we saw them in the store, we were excited!  “The CARA CARAs are back!” we practically sing songed in the produce section.

Last year I loved 'em so much I wanted to marry 'em!

Alas, we should have kept our happy memories of better crops in 2015.  This year the cara caras we got are dry, bland, and kinda sorta tasteless…

Originally they got a coveted 5 star review.  I don’t give those out willy nilly, mind you!  And I feel bad if people read that review and rushed out to buy Cara Caras, only to be duped by some little round balls pretending to be tasty oranges.

Photo circa 2015; back in the time when Cara Caras were astoundingly delicious.

So I will give them a new score today.  Sorry Cara Caras, we loved you last year, but this year you disappoint.  Sigh.

New rating – 2.5

Suzy Soup

Recently some friends invited us over for dinner.  It was great fun!!!  They made a delicious dinner (dessert to be reviewed at a later date) AND shared a recipe for a soup that they make using all Trader Joe’s ingredients!

Well, of course we had to try that out!!!  So we collected ingredients and set out to make what I have decided should be called SUZY SOUP.  Yes, I know that Suzy and Rob, the friends who had us over for dinner, like to call it Tortilla Soup, but they are wrong.  In our house it will henceforth be known as SUZY SOUP.

Wanna make it?  It is, as Suzy told me, “Easy peasy lemon squeezy!”.   Here is how to make it:

Ingredients

1 can black beans, drained (reviewed here)
1 can corn, drained (reviewed here)
1 box chicken broth (reviewed here)
1 jar Trader Joe’s Double Roasted Salsa (this was our first time having this product!)
Chicken (boneless, skinless) – sautéed

Combine all ingredients listed above in a pot to heat (after sautéing the chicken)

Can't you almost SMELL it cooking???

Now here is the fun part!

Fill little bowls with:

grated jack cheese
cilantro
sliced avocados
sour cream (or Suzy says you can use plain yogurt but we were too scared to try that)
tortilla chips (we used our favorite Blue Corn Chips (reviewed here)
chopped onion (we got crazy and added this!)
chopped tomato (again, Suzy didn’t tell us to have this, but it made the soup amazing!)

Then let everyone fill their bowl with Suzy Soup and top with whatever toppings from the little bowls they would like!!  (Of course, at our house, we each put in EVERYTHING!)

We were so excited to EAT Suzy Soup that I forgot to take a photo until my bowl was nearly empty... 

SERIOUSLY good soup.  Perfect for cold winter nights.  Super easy to make yet somehow looks fancy!

The only downside I can think of is that when you are done with dinner you not only have SOUP BOWLS to wash, you have lots of tiny bowls that were filled with toppings to clean, too.  But that is a small price to pay for such a delicious meal.  David reports that one other downside is that it is so tasty, that SOME PEOPLE (editor’s note – there was a bit of guilt in his voice when he reported this…) might eat TOO MUCH and then go to bed with a very full belly and have a hard time sleeping… 

I CAUGHT HIM eating a second (or third??) helping!!

The recipe made more than the 2 of us could eat but it was GREAT as leftovers.  I can’t really list a PRICE here, because it depends on what topping ingredients you buy.  But it is not expensive to make.

Rating - 5

Molten Salted Butterscotch Macarons

Well this is awwwwkward…  I am doing something unusual for me today – I am working on the blog in public.  Normally I hole up at home to write, but today I decided to pack up the computer and head to Panera to write a review.  It just so happens that the Panera I chose is a couple doors down from our favorite Trader Joe’s.  And it appears that there is a bit of a TJ’s employee meeting happening here even as I type!  Several TJ’s peeps are decked out in their TJ’s attire eating and chatting nearby!  (Not near enough for me to be eavesdropping, mind you, or for THEM to see me setting out to write what is sure to be a negative review of one of their products…)  Like I said, awkward…

So yeah – Molten Salted Butterscotch Macarons.  I mean – judging from the name alone – these things have to be FABULOUS, right??!  Nothing about the name suggests anything other than greatness.  I was excited when we saw these in the frozen food section at TJ’s.  We had been invited over for a very belated Christmas celebration with our in-laws and we were in charge of bringing dessert.  “Bam!  Dessert chosen!” I thought when we saw these.  The serving size says 1 macaron, and there are 2 to a box.  Our dinner event would have 5 guests, so we weren’t sure how many boxes to buy.  We grabbed 2 boxes, thinking we could cut them in half and people could grab at them until they were gone.

They look pretty on the box, don't they?

We needn’t have worried.  Let’s just say, there was no fighting over these puppies.

They were easy to cook – you just bung them in the microwave.  Please note that “they were easy to cook” statement, as it is likely to be the last positive statement about this product in this review. 

Reviewers were us and our in-laws, who are notoriously LOW GRADERS on this blog.  I usually take that into account, that their opinion of products is consistently lower than ours, but on this one, we were all pretty much agreed.



Photo with my hand so you can get the idea of how big these suckers are.

Greg:  “It has a…  (VERY LOUD PRETEND BARFING SOUND)…  I get a bitter, salty, BURNED taste (very ugly facial expression).  I give these a -1.  (Editor’s note – I explained that he could not rate a product less than a 0, so he changed his score to a 0.)

Chris (our nephew, a senior in high school, who eats everything):  “Well, I do agree with Dad…  The mixture of flavors in the taste aspect is a little more BITTER rather than SWEET.  And the wafers don’t add much taste to the overall effect of the fake macarons.  I think the caramel-y-ness of this dish is a little overwhelming really.  Out of a possible 5 I would give this a 1.75.”

Chris LOOKS happy to be eating this dessert, but he was faking it.  He is an actor.

David:  “I am gonna say (pause to eat more…)….  Not a lotta taste here (“Amen!” heard in the background from Chris).  The macaroons are okay.  I think they would be okay, they would be BETTER with something CREAMY like whipped cream in the middle.  This filling that they’ve got doesn’t really make it for me.  It is, as they said, rather BURNED tasting.  It is sliiiiightly sweet, but I don’t think it’s a good idea.  I am gonna give it a 2.25.”

Joan:  “I LOVE CARAMEL.  I was excited to try this dessert.  I found the caramel VERY disappointing.  And the cookie – I left that on my plate… .  (Editor’s note:  SNAP!  DAMN!  COLD HEARTED!!!  She didn’t even EAT the cookie part!) I took the extra effort to LICK the caramel out of the center, but it doesn’t taste very caramel-y.  I still found it very disappointing  I give them a .5 .”

The macaron part was unworthy of Joan's attention.

Susan:  I, like Joan, was VERY EXCITED about these.  In fact I have a picture of David with them in the store practically peeing his pants he was so excited about them.  Soooo – these definitely did NOT live up to our expectation. The size is TOO BIG.  They would be nicer if they were 6 little petite teeny bits instead of 2 big honkin’ ones.  The macarons are too thick.  I don’t taste the same “burnt” taste that the others tasted, and I also don’t taste the salt.  And Joan and I agree – it also doesn’t taste very CARAMEL-ish.  But if it all came down to it, I would rather have some caramel in a DISH and not this blob of stuff masquerading as dessert.  And Trader Joe’s makes some DELICIOUS caramels.  Those are more worthy of your money and your calories.  In fact, Chris suggests that even a Werther’s candy would be more caramel tasting and yummier.  I like that these were WARM.  I like that the inside was mushy.  But these are a big disappointment.  I would give these a 2.

See???  We were excited about them before we tasted them...

One really lucky thing happened to our belated Christmas dinner:  Joan received an edible arrangement – fruit dipped in chocolate – as a gift for helping a little old lady out during the blizzard.  So even though the Molten Salted Butterscotch Macarons were a flop, the dinner was a big success and we ate chocolate dipped fruit on sticks for dessert!!

We ended up returning the second box of these yucky macarons to Trader Joe’s and of course, they took them back no questions asked. 

Overall review:  these are over-sized, over-priced, and super yucky.  Don’t get them. 

Price – $3.99

Rating (average of 5 reviewers) -  1.5

P.S. – We also went to see the hilarious political satire group “The Capitol Steps” after dinner.  If you are ever in the DC region you should see them.  Of course, given the current political climate they have a LOT of funny material to choose from.  It’s almost too easy, really.  If you want to hear one of their songs you can have a listen here (this is not my favorite one, they had one with Ruth Bader Ginsberg that cracked me up.) Jeb song  Learn more about them here:  Capitol Steps site

P.P.S. – Sales pitch from Chris – if you are in the Northern Virginia area stop by TOBY’S HOMEMADE ICE CREAM AND COFFEE in Westover.  You can get a Salted Caramel Ice Cream for $2.65 (small).  Chris works there.  J