Monsooned Malabar Coffee

Monsooned Malabar Coffee

Monsooned Malabar is a new coffee on the Trader Joe’s shelves (Spring 2017).  It is a medium roast 100% Arabica whole bean coffee, and the label bills it as “full body, woodsy aromatics”.  AROMATICS?  Hmmm, they are using what I think of as an adjective as a noun here, aren’t they?  Let’s look up “aromatics”, shall we??

I checked out http://www.cooksmarts.com/articles/add-flavor-aromatics/  and learned this:  “Aromatics are combinations of vegetables and herbs (and sometimes even meats) that are heated in some fat – like butter, oil, or coconut milk – at the beginning of a dish. The heated fat helps these ingredients release addictive aromas and impart deep flavors into the dish that’s being cooked.”

Well, this is COFFEE so I know they do not mean that definition.  “Aromatics” as a plural adjective sounds awkward to me, but maybe that is just because I haven’t used it that way before.  Let’s assume they have a grammar expert on payroll at Trader Joe’s corporate and roll with it, ok?

NOW LET’S STOP BEING GRAMMAR NAZI-WANNA-BEs and SKIP TO THE REVIEW!!

This can (10 oz) is smaller than most other Trader Joe’s coffee cans.  It is a short, squat can with pretty monsoon-like artwork. 

Coffee - the civilized way to start a day

Let’s see what David thinks of it, “I like it very much.  It is very smooth and very richly full-bodied.  “Wood-sy flavor” be any better if I knew what to call it??  (Bwahahaha – a little breakfast humor there from David, riffing on the “woodsy flavor” line on the label.)  I am gonna give this a 4.5.”

David tasting the product (and reading the paper).  He is using my currently 2nd favorite coffee mug - HRC.  Isn't it pretty?

As for me, I don’t get the “woodsy flavor” reference.  It doesn’t taste like sitting round a campfire (burning wood) or Deep Woods Off insect repellent to me.  When I mentioned this to David, he thought it meant “wood like autumn”, but that doesn’t make sense either, since they are selling it in the spring… 

$6.99 a can

I agree with David that this is a nice, smooth coffee.  It is not quite as strong as I prefer my coffee, but I liked it.  I think it is perfect for David (who prefers his coffee a bit lighter than I do).  I have no complaints about this coffee.  I can’t say it is the BEST cup of coffee I have ever had in my whole life, but it is better than some of the weak, boring varieties we have tried from TJs.  This is a fine cup of joe.  I give it a 4.

And since ol’ Neil Gorsuch endured day 2 of grilling today, I will include a photo of my current favorite coffee cup here.  It features none other than Notorious RBG, the most bad ass Supreme Court Justice ever.  May she be healthy and strong for at least 4 more years!!!  GO RUTH!!

RBG - fearlessly defined

Price:  $6.99

Rating:  4.25

Day 180 - Smooth & Mellow Blend (Whole Bean Coffee)

Continuing the ever elusive search for the perfect coffee…

I believe this is the NINTH review for coffee in this blog.  I am trying HARD to find the very best one!!! 

I recently picked up a very fancy (non Trader Joe’s) tin of coffee (yes, TIN…  Even fancier than a CAN, no???)  It was the night before my birthday and I thought I deserved something uber delightful, so I tossed some Lavazza Caffe Espresso (see, even the NAME is fancy!!) coffee in the cart.

That stuff is BITTER as all get out!!!!  Man sakes alive it is bitter… So I have been “cutting it” with Trader Joe’s coffee and making a blend.  Well, we ran out of TJ’s so last night got a can of Smooth and Mellow Blend (whole bean).  It has a funny drawing on the front – two hipsters sitting in hip chairs, one wearing hip glasses.  The lady says, “I feel so relaxed” and the dude says, “…and yet so alert”.  So I am guessing Trader Joe’s is implying that drinking this coffee will make me 3 things:  relaxed, alert, and hip.  Fingers crossed!  J

See the hipsters sipping java??

I thought it was a great coffee to buy considering the circumstances, especially when I mentioned to David that we needed coffee to mix with the Lavazza Coffee and he replied, “Yes, to smooth it out!”.  Did he say SMOOTH?  Why, SMOOTH is in the NAME of this coffee, it has to be the perfect one, no???

The can claims “The acidity is light, the flavor is well rounded and fully developed.  Never bitter…”.  I would agree.  It was not bitter.  Not acidic.  But I guess I would add that it was a tiny bit dull…  Well, I mean, if I were the copy writer for Trader Joe’s marketing I would not ad that, of course, but here in this blog I feel free to tell you that this coffee didn’t knock my socks off.  Since I was reviewing it I brewed it alone (not as a blend with the Lavazza coffee) and it was okay but not magnificent.   

Here's MY hipster drinking a cup of Smooth and Mellow Blend

And do you know what?  I drank a whole cup of it and I do not feel the least bit more hip.  Damn.  I am not sure it worked.  Sigh.

Medium roast, medium price, medium taste

So overall, this is ok for a basic coffee but nothing special to write home about.

Price – $6.49

Rating – 3.5

Day 149 - Organic Sumatra Coffee

In the ever elusive search for Trader Joe’s best coffee, we invested in yet another can.  This one we bought at the Orlando Trader Joe’s.  It is the 8^th Trader Joe’s coffee we have tried this year (we usually each drink one cup of joe every morning).

Organic Sumatra Coffee on the shelf in Orlando

Gotta say, we still haven’t found it (“it” being the ideal, delicious, amazing cup of coffee).  The last one I reviewed (Ethiopian on Day 138) was the best so far with a 4.25 rating.

This one, Organic Sumatra, is boring.  It bills itself as having “smooth, earthy notes” but the “notes” aren’t strong enough to really be tasted I guess.  It is not that it is BAD, it is just that it is blah.  Not enough taste to get me jump started in the morning.  (Note on how I prepared this:  freshly ground the beans right before making coffee, heated water in a kettle, and used a French press.  See??  It SHOULD have been delicious! J )

Sure, it'll do, but it is not an amazing start to the day

We will keep trying!!  As soon as this can is gone I am sure another experiment awaits us.

Price – $7.99

Rating – 3.5

Day 138 - Ethiopian Coffee

I am STILL on the ever elusive hunt for the perfect whole bean coffee from Trader Joe’s.  This is the 5^th coffee review on this blog (days 22, 47, 73, 119, and TODAY) – but one review was actually for 3 smaller cans that came as a trio but reviewed on one day, so I guess we have tried 7 TJ’s coffees this year.

This one is one of the better coffees we have found on the Trader Joe’s shelves.  It is rich and tasty but does not have the bitter quality that infected some of the others.  It is a medium dark roast and has all the politically correct bells and whistles – organic, fair trade, and they also throw in SHADE GROWN.  J  David’s adjectives for his cup are, “mild, gentle, and smooth”.

A bit pricier than some other cans you will find on the shelves, but tastes better

Normally we make coffee either in an automatic espresso maker.  Some days we make what I call “camper fire coffee” – you know, using an Italian metal coffee maker on the stove.  But when we are in Florida (where we are currently) we use a French Press, and I wonder if THAT is what is making this coffee taste better.  Well, THAT or the fact that I am making coffee like my friend Malonda (who never reads this blog so will miss this shout out to her) makes – strong French Press coffee with a big dollop of sweetened condensed milk in it, yummmm…. 

So I guess I fear I have given this particular can of Trader Joe’s coffee a leg up on the others that I reviewed because of HOW I am brewing the coffee (plus the fact that I am drinking it in a relaxed, sunny, warm dining room every morning instead of rushing around or in a “to go” cup while commuting). 

A warm, sunny, tasty way to start the day

Well, whether it is because of the actual TASTE of this coffee or because of the relaxed environment it is being drunk in, I guess I cannot know at the moment.  But what I do know is, it is good – dare I say better than the other 6 I have reviewed this year.  I will buy this can again.

Price – $9.99

Rating – 4.25

Day 119 - Fair Trade Organic Bolivian Blend (coffee)

Gosh, this is like the 4^th Trader Joe’s coffee I have reviewed on this blog this year, and I still have not found the PERFECT cup (see coffee reviews on day 73, day 47, and day 22 – and wouldn’t ya know, the one we liked the best was a SEASONAL ITEM so you can only get it around the holidays!).   I KNOW we have bought one there that was quite good, but which one was it???

The search for the most delicious Trader Joe's coffee continues...

This one bills itself as “sweet, caramel flavor, medium body”.  I would add “bitter”.  It is fair trade and organic, so those are pluses.  But it just does not hit the perfect coffee sweet spot that I am searching to find.   I mean, it will do to wake you up in the morning, but it won’t make you sing and dance, know what I mean? 

Sign doesn't say "bitter"...  Not that I'm bitter about that.

I will continue trying the other cans of Trader Joe’s coffee beans until I find the best one.  Keep your eye out for more coffee reviews! 

Price -$7.99

Rating – 3.25

Day 73 - Coffee Trio

As so often happens to us, we were out of coffee and looking at the shelves of Trader Joe’s trying to remember which ones we liked.  But strangely, there seemed to be a few NEW COFFEES that we had never seen before, including an adorable little set of three – a coffee trio! 

Being smart shoppers (at least we like to think of ourselves as smart shoppers…) we wanted to do the math before deciding to get them.  I know that NORMALLY petite little sets of things end up costing MORE than if you were to just buy the regular sized items – think hand lotions or lip balms at Body Shop or Victoria’s Secret at holiday time…  But when we did the math on this set, the numbers turned out good!  There are three cans, each about half the size of a “normal” coffee can, and the total price is $4.99.  (I wish I could list exact sizes, but I have thrown the outside packaging away and the cans do not have the sizes on them – they are labeled “not for individual retail sale”.)  We figured buying the three smaller cans was a good way to try more varieties of coffee!

Coffee Trio - limited quantities!

So far we have opened two cans – Papua New Guinea and Uganda (I can’t really say “Uganda” without hearing the line from “Book of Morman” in my head where our hero gets assigned a mission trip to Uganda…).  We really like the Papua New Guinea variety and Uganda is not half bad.  Looking forward to trying Peru, but thought I should post the review NOW so that if you, too, want to get in on the petite can action you can do so before they run out (this is not a normally stocked product, the sign said “Limited Quantities”.  Now that I think about it, these MIGHT be left-overs from the holiday stock, but expiration dates on them are not until October 2015.)

So in a nutshell – buy the trio.  Good way to taste 3 varieties of coffee!

P.S. – to Trader Joe’s (if any corporate people have found their way to this blog) – why is there an EXTRA LID in this set?  There are three cans, but four plastic lids.  Even though we will recycle them, seems like a waste. 

Price – $4.99

Rating - 4