Day 266 - Tuscan Pane Bread

WHYYYYY don’t I listen to my gut and just STOP.  BUYING.  BREAD.  AT.  TRADER.  JOE’S.

We have not found a loaf we like.  We have tried a few (some prior to beginning this blog project so they have not been reviewed here) and have not been satisfied with any of them.  I really like the British Crumpets that they sell, and we were surprised how good the Bagel Spinozas were.  Those are both BREAD PRODUCTS, but  not loaves of bread.  All of the loaves of bread we have bought at Trader Joe’s have been bad (in my humble opinion).

So recently I reviewed one of the yucky ones, Whole Wheat Bread, and an avid reader and one of the few people who takes time to comment on this blog, the lovely TTrockwood, commented and recommended that we try Tuscan Pane bread.  Well TTrockwood, we took your advice.  We bought it.  We tried it.  Bleck!  J  (I am not blaming you!  We have free will here, haha! )

WHO is buying this stuff?  :)

Check it out – the sign above Tuscan Pane says that this bread is the BEST SELLER.  I am not sure if that is nationwide over-all best seller or that store.  But if it is just the best seller for that store all I can say is oh man, either TTrockwood lives near us and is going to the same TJ’s as us and buying tons of this crap, or other people like it better than we do. 

David's slice - see how there is not much honey?
That is cuz it all OOZED THROUGH THE BIG CRACKS and is hiding under the bread in this photo.  

I made David a slice of this bread with nice butter and Turkish Honey (which rocks).  Here is what he thought of it – “Good taste.  Nice texture.  It has a hard crust, so if you are looking for a bread with no crust this is not your baby.  But it does have good taste and, at least the first day, is not too hard.  It does have huge crater-like holes in it and the honey (and everything else you put on it) falls through.”

Looks ok on the shelf

Here is what the package looks like

As for me, sadly, this still is not my favorite breads in the world.  It is VERY DRY.  It needed a ton of butter.  I think the HONEY on David’s made his a little more moist (and a lot more delicious).  Mine had butter with cheddar cheese. We also have had 2 sandwiches made with it and that made a big mess, because by the second sandwich I refused to eat most of the bread so I got mayo and tomato juice all over…

A TJ’s employee told us that they didn’t understand why this bread sells so well and recommended yet ANOTHER different loaf.  However, I am now scared of all Trader Joe’s breads…  Not, like, “Monster under the bed” scared, but “Oh man is this gonna be gross??” scared.  Know what I mean?

Here is mine - cheddar cheese on top.  The cheese and the pomegranate seeds in the green bowl were the best part!

Maybe TJ’s breads are healthier than the breads I enjoy and have, like, zero preservatives or something, I do not know.  But if I could use a sports metaphor here (which I never do cuz I am not into sports) – this bread was not a home run for me. 

David thinks the reason this bread is the best seller is because people like to picture themselves sitting in a café in Italy eating fancy bread.  That makes no sense to me, cuz if I was in an Italian café and they served me THIS BREAD I would gag.  Well, who orders BREAD in an Italian café anyway, David?

This is a HARD, DRY BREAD.  I like the crusts better than the actual bread.  The crust I expect to be hard, but the bread needs to have at least a smidgeon of “give” to it. 

The first day was really the only day this loaf was edible to me.  And even then it wasn’t great.

Price – $2.49

Rating – 2.75 (note – David rated it a 3, but I am overruling his on this one and rating it myself to save you the heartbreak of buying it)

Day 256 - Turkish Honey

We bought this honey in early 2015 in a LaJolla, CA Trader Joe’s.  As sometimes happened early on in this project, we would see a product in another state at a Trader Joe’s and think, “Wait!  We do not have that at our LOCAL Trader Joe’s!”.   We would be envious!!  And we would BUY said product, thinking we had scored a special gem.  Later, upon returning home and going to our local Trader Joe’s, we would inevitably find the same product on the shelf there…  In truth, most Trader Joe’s carry the same products.  There are a few local items at some stores, but 9 times out of 10 you can find the same products in different states.  (Local BEER is an exception, and some local wines as well.) 

La Jolla, CA Trader Joe's signage - cool lettering, eh?

So though we BOUGHT it early on in this project, we only recently got around to opening it.  Yes, we flew with it in a checked suitcase (couldn’t carry it in our carry on, honey is liquid) from California, put it in the cupboard, and waited months to open it.  We do not get through a ton of honey in our household so this one waited for us until another bottle was empty.

It was worth the wait!

Here is the bottle - can you see the pretty color of the honey?

I served it the other morning over Greek yogurt and peaches.  Here is what we thought of it:

David – “GREAT.  HONEY.  Smooth.  Rich.  Sweet, but not overly sweet.  And with the fabulous lingering afater-taste – no, it is really a taste at the “back end” of the experience like a Crème Caramel Brulee.  I have had many honeys, this is my favorite.  (I clarified here- your favorite of ALL THE HONEYS YOU HAVE EVER HAD IN YOUR LIFE, or of the Trader Joe’s honeys you have had, or what??)  Of all the honeys I can REMEMBER, which severely limits the field (this concept cracked us both up, because David, though he has an amaaaazing memory for the physical work in his solo shows, in general has a pretty crappy memory).   It is nice.“

Susan – This honey comes in a larger container than most honeys (1 lb 8 ounces), which worried me because, as I mentioned above, we do not get through a ton of honey.  David eats the majority of honey consumed in our house.  The last year or so I have taken to putting sugar on my yogurt (I know, I know, spreading SUGAR on yogurt immediately negates any and all health impacts the yogurt may have had…).  The “sugar on yogurt-y like food” thing is something I learned in Paris when we used to cover these little Petit Suisses with sugar.  Yummmmmy. 

Isn't is BEAUTIFUL?  Look at it pouring out - ahhhhh....  

Anyway, I was worried the container was too big for our use, but I think we will get through this one.  David loves this one so much he swears he will get through it.  We usually buy the cute little Honey BEARS, you know the ones.  But this honey is muuuuch tastier than those bears.  It is a darker, more golden color, too.  The cheaper honey bear honey is more yellow and see through.

The label says that the honey bees making this honey primarily foraged Rock Rose, Citrus, Wildflowers and Turkish Pines.  Maybe it is the PINES that give it that different taste.  It almost tastes a little bit burnt, but burnt in a GOOD WAY – a warm, nice, toasty way.  It is SWEET, but with a warm, toasty taste. 

Ahhhh- yogurt, fresh peach, and this golden  honey, what a tasty breakfast!

I like this a lot better than other honey we have had.  It is a good product and we think you should try it.

Price – $5.99

Rating - 5