Tarte d’Alsace

Hi guys!!!  I AM BACK!  Well, back for this review I mean.

Man, we got this pizza at the Orlando (Winterpark) Trader Joe’s and as soon as we took our first bites we looked at each other and said, “NOW THIS IS A GOOD PIZZA!” (we might have said something similar to that, I was way too busy eating pizza to write down our exact words).  Have you tried this one??  If you have not, please take a moment now to add it to your shopping list for your next visit to TJ’s.

David misunderstanding "tarte" for "tart"...  

The box says that this is a “French style flatbread with ham, caramelized onion, and gruyere cheese”.  Here is how I cooked this puppy:  heat the oven to 450 degrees for ten minutes, then put the pizza on a baking tray and cook it between 8 – 10 minutes (I cooked it 12 minutes).

Here are our rave reviews:

David – “This is great.  Oh my God.  The HAM is really tasty in a way that makes me think, it’s not the kind of ham you think of, it might be, like, pancetta or something like that.  The gruyere, of course, is a delicious cheese that you seldom run into.  The bread itself is crispy, thin and delightful because of the oil, or butter, the cheese or something – SOMETHING is going on there.  The whole thing is delightful!  Because you think you are gonna get a piece of pizza, ok, pizza, more pizza, oh well…  But then it turns out to be this FLATBREAD!  A flatbread that is soooo tasty, without the leaden weight of an American pizza thing.  Great!  High marks Trader Joe’s!!”

Oh man, looking at the photo makes my mouth water...  I wish we had another one to eat for dinner tonight.

I was trying to figure out the taste I was loving.  I thought maybe there was a béchamel sauce under the cheese or something.  But then I looked at the box and discovered the mystery – crème fraiche!  I think, to me, THAT is what gives it the simply amazing taste.  Well, that PLUS the gruyere.  Well, those two things PLUS the flatbread…  It is the combination of those three things that makes this such a winner.

(One theory that I have is that, as long as they started with those 3 ingredients I just raved about above, they could have topped it off with turds and it would still taste amazing.  Not that I want to SAMPLE that if they do it, mind you, but I’m just saying, with a base of those 3 rockin’ ingredients I might just accept whatever came next.)

The HAM has a nice little bit of salty quality but it is not at all overly salty.  Normally when I eat pizza I add hot pepper or hot pepper flakes to it.  David wanted to add extra mozzarella to this before we cooked it and I convinced him not to.  That was right!  Do NOT add to this masterpiece!  It is the perfect pizza without any messing around needed!!

This flatbread is seriously worth every penny of the $4.49

One weird thing about this item is that it is branded as being made by “Maître Pierre”.  Normally any French style stuff at TJ’s is branded “Trader Jacques” so that freaked us out a bit.  What’s up with that, Joe??  Anyone from corporate reading and can comment??

Quick side note here:  so we have been luxuriating in Florida for a month now.  It is almost time for our 14 hour drive back to real life.  Yes, cold winter looms.  But so does quick, easy access to TRADER JOE’S!!  We have missed it.  We brought lots of wine from TJ’s with us when we came to Florida, but not enough to last a whole month.  We had to break down and buy wine at the local Florida supermarket (Publix) this week! 

Look!  We don't ONLY shop at Trader Joe's!  We went to Ikea in Orlando.

I wanted to show you our new exciting stuff from Ikea!  The Florida house is very “beachy” – it is a block and a half from the ocean.  Because it is a vacation home, it is painted in what we think of as VACATION COLORS!  It is bright, bright, bright!  And now there is a kitchen cabinet to match it all!  Check out the new Ikea STUVA!!! 

David, in unmatched jammies, with the flatbread, in front of the Stuva.  What a combination!

It is designed to be a piece of furniture in a kid’s bedroom, but who says it is limited to that!  We have had it in the kitchen here 2 weeks now and it is working great!  We also got the little cutting board/table thing next to it and a butcher block to go on top of it.  Yeah, we went a little Ikea crazy…

The Stuva open - David loves the pull out wire drawer.  The dining room is the same color green as the Stuva.

The new wooden stand.  This is after we put beeswax treatment on the top of it, and before David went a little wacko and covered the whole entire thing with the treatment stuff...  Note the TJ's cider!!  

If you want to see more about the beach house or consider renting it for your vacation, check it out here:  Hibiscus House website

Back to the flatbread:  granted, we were hungry when we ate this item.  But we loved it.  We both give it a rating of 5.  We will for sure be having it again when we get back to Trader Joe’s land. 

It was fun “talking” with you guys again.  Have fun grocery shopping!

P.S. - I somehow messed up the formatting/template of this blog.  Sigh.  It doesn't look the same anymore, does it??  I have tried to get it back to how it used to be but to no avail.  Is it ok like this? Still readable? 

Price – $4.49

Rating - 5

I Miss You!

Hi guys!  I miss you!!  :)

We went to Trader Joe's in Winter Park yesterday, and it was SO ODD to not to "have to" take photos for the blog!!  We did get a few things - I mean, just cuz the blog is "done" (save sporadic reviews) doesn't mean we are not shopping at TJ's anymore!!

We saw something while we were there that I wish I had picked up but didn't - Hatch Valley Peppers FROZEN, not the salsa!!  Has anyone else seen them?  We are totally spoiled by our usual living situation: I bet there are ten Trader Joe's in a 20 mile radius from our home...  But here in Florida it is a 90 minute drive to TJ's, sigh.  So I can't just pop back to the store to grab them!

Friends in the DC metro area that may be reading this - can one of you pick me up one of this frozen Hatch Valley pepper product and hold it for a couple of weeks for me??  I will pay you back and pick it up when we are in town.  Pretty please??  I fear they will be gone by the time we are back in Trader Joe's land!!

And readers far and wide (not only DC) - WHAT DOES ONE DO WITH THIS FROZEN PEPPER PRODUCT??  I do not know what in the world I would DO with it if I am lucky enough to snag one, but I literally lost sleep over missing out on getting one last night.  :)

Here is a quick photo of David, in case you are missing the funny shots of him with Trader Joe's products.  This one was taken yesterday in the Orlando Ikea where we made FOUR, count 'em, FOUR trips around the entiiiire store in our quest to find the perfect items!

Who DOESN'T need a SMARTASSEL, no matter the cost?????  

Day 213 - Crispy Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies

These are another in the collection of perfectly sized little Trader Joe’s cookies.  They store them in an odd place – on shelves over the frozen food bins.  So you have to brave the cold of the frozen food aisle to get to them, but they are worth it.

Cookies and signage in Orlando, FL Trader Joe's in May

Cookies and signage in the Chicago (South Loop) Store in July.  See how the signs vary by location?
In house artists make them all!

To me, these cookies were not all that “oatmeal-y”, but David claims they were JUST OATMEAL-Y ENOUGH.  J  The chocolate chips are pretty delightful – little bits of luscious.  The cookies are just the right size if you ask me.  You can eat them in one bite if you like (my method) or bite them into smaller pieces (I just checked with David, who I knew didn’t eat them in one bite.  Guess what?  He says he gets FOUR BITES per cookie out of these Cabbage Patch sized treats!)

These are a yummy and simple snack or dessert.  Throw a few in your lunch bag, or sit and munch on some while you tune into “Ellen” in the afternoon.  They are, of course, not as good as if you made them homemade, but they are good.  They are head and shoulders above other store bought cookies (like those nasty Chips Ahoys).

David claims, “I think they are a perfect balance of substance and sweet taste.  I recommend them.  They are not crumbly, they are CRUNCHY but not CRUMBLY”.

This is a boy about to eat cookies.

Yup.  These are good.  And they travel well for long drives, too, presuming you have air conditioning in the car and don’t leave them in the hot sun.  Trader Joe’s packs them in a little plastic tub that seals up nice and tight.  Can you say, “ROAD TRIP!!!”? 

And I just did the math and I do believe these babies work out to only a nickel a cookie.  I told David who declared, “Wow!  You could eat 20 of ‘em for a dollar!  Nice!!”.  We are easy to entertain folks, easy to entertain.

Price – $3.99

Rating – 4.5

Day 146 - Carrot and Cilantro Bulgur Grain Salad

Ok Orlando Trader Joe’s, you have some false advertising going on…  When we popped in the other day for a healthy bite to eat during a festival where we were subsisting on fried foods (including FRIED CHEESE CURDS and FRIED PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY SANDWICHES) for 12 days, I thought I had hit the tasty jackpot with this Carrot and Cilantro Bulgur Grain Salad (with garbanzo beans).  I mean, I love cilantro!  And I really like garbanzo beans.  Carrots are nice.  And bulgur grain, well, sure, I can eat it.  And your sign, your sweet little handwritten sign, specifically said, “So good!”.

"So Good!" - got me!!

 You so lie.

Avoid this salad.  Unless you enjoy eating dry, bland, yucky stuff.  If so, stock up on this salad.

This salad is BLECK.  The main problem is that it is dry.   Sure, if I had been at home instead of under a festival beer tent, I could have doctored it up with a bit of olive oil and lemon or something, but really, when one invests $3.69 into a tiny container of salad, should one be expected to “doctor it up”??  I think not.  And I would have had to add A LOT of stuff to give it any sort of taste.  And, if I could add one more complaint here, there was not nearly enough cilantro!  That was the ingredient that might have saved this wreck of a salad, but it was barely in there.

Thumbs down for this overpriced, under tasty salad.

David also thought this was crappy, as you can see.

Bleck.

Fool me once, Orlando Trader Joe’s signs, shame on you…  I am not going to be duped by you again!

Price - $3.69

Rating – 1.5

Day 145 - Strawberry Chia 100% Juice Smoothie

I thought it was just ME who was childish.  But no, lucky for me, it turns out my partner David is, too J. 

We rushed into the Orlando Trader Joe’s today with only a few minutes to shop between seeing plays.  We wanted a SALAD so that we could have a healthy meal (as opposed to the poutine, pizza, and other meal choices available from vendors at the festival (though we did have a good Greek salad from a vendor one night…).  Anyway, it was super hot out (as Orlando can be in the summer time…) and I decided a cold, healthy drink was in order, too (to balance out all the beer from the festival).  So I grabbed this Strawberry Chia 100% Juice Smoothie.

If you do not know from previous reviews on this blog, we are not health nuts.  We do not go out of our way to buy things with fancy organic ingredients, and CHIA, in my mind, is only for pets, as in the Willy Nelson Chia Pet I saw on the clearance table at Office Depot recently!  (Why a gem like that would be on a clearance table is beyond me!!)  Anyway, I thought it was just me who would think something so silly, then David quipped, “If I drink this will chia grass grow in my belly?”.  Haha – see why we get along so well?

A pint of health - strawberry chia smoothie 

So this “strawberry puree flavored blend with apple juice and chia seeds” is pretty good.  It mostly tastes like strawberry.  But there are strange little BUMPS all up in it…  At first I thought they were the little bits from the outside of strawberries, then I realized, duh, those are the CHIA SEEDS!  They are actually a bit more fine and delicate than a strawberry seed thing would be.  This drink is chock full of them.  After the first sip or two I got used to them, but still, if I am going to have “bits” in my drink, I would rather they be tapioca bubbles (yum – bubble tea!!).

I would say this snack drink would be better consumed not in the hot humid sun.  I can picture it going down better while a person is sitting at their desk and needs a bit of an afternoon pick-me-up. 

Price – $2.99

Rating – 3.25

Day 140 - A Midsummer Night's Cream

I ran out of lotion.  We are in Florida.  We went to a new Trader Joe’s for us - the one in Orlando!  I was verrrry tempted to buy the amazing lotion I purchased recently (which I do not currently have with me) that got an awesome 5 star review on day 120 (Lavender Hand and Body Lotion).  However, I have a commitment to this blog, and it means one new product review per day.  So purchasing NEW things is a requirement!  And it was in that spirit that I picked up this Midsummer Night’s Cream (well, I really liked the name of it, of course, and that made it easier to choose this and not the Lavender one, too…).

Very reasonable price - check out the signage - this is from the ORLANDO, FL TRADER JOE'S

Anyway, this cream says it is the “extra dry formula”, and they ain’t a kiddin’!  By “extra dry” I think they mean “you want this if your skin is made of cardboard”.  This is toooooo moisturizing.  I know, I know, that sounds impossible!  How could something possible moisturize TOO MUCH?  Try this cream and you will understand what I am trying to put into words. 

It is not that it is GREASY, per se.  It is not THICK, per se.   It is just, well, TOO DANG LOTION-Y!  I put it all over my body after my shower yesterday and today and both days I just feel like I have a COATING on me.  I use lotion every single day, so I KNOW lotion.  And let’s just say, this one is not on my list of favorites.

A bird's eye view of the cream

Then I thought, perhaps since it is called A Midsummer NIGHT’S Cream that it was only meant to be used before bed (at night) as an extra emollient extravaganza or something!  So I read the label, which clearly says, “For best results, it should be massaged thoroughly into the skin morning and evening, and as needed”.  Well, I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt!

It says it is an herbal blend with aloe, and I have been in the sun, so perhaps this will be good for my skin.  It is unscented.

Price - $3.99

Rating – 2.5